As a parent, seeing your child struggle with anxiety can be heart-wrenching.  Especially for those of us parents who also experience high anxiety, it can be hard to know who to soothe first!  

Anxiety in children can manifest in various ways, such as excessive worry, fear, restlessness, or physical symptoms like headaches and stomachaches. Supporting your child through these tough times is crucial for their well-being and development. 

Before listing some ideas of how to support your child, however, it’s worth noting that your child is going to pick up on your state of being as a way to gauge whether they are going to be okay.  So, if their nerves are activating your own, it’s important to take the time you need to get your own feet on the ground - take your own deep breaths - first. 

By managing your own stress effectively, you provide a positive example for your child to follow, but it’s much more than setting a good example.  Nervous systems communicate and impact each other without words, so simply by being a calm presence around your kid, you are going to have a positive impact.

Now, here are some effective strategies to help your child manage anxiety.

1. Open Communication

Encourage your child to talk about their feelings. Create a safe and non-judgmental space where they feel comfortable expressing their worries and fears. Listen attentively and validate their emotions without dismissing or minimizing their concerns.  It’s normal to try and “fix” the issue right away, but do your best to be a warm, empathic container for their concerns.  

As you validate your kids anxiety it might sound something like this. “This is a signal your body is giving that is trying to get you to pay attention. And you’re doing a great job paying attention to that signal!  Nice work.  Now, we want to understand what that signal is trying to tell us so we can respond and be helpful.”

2. Teach Coping Skills

Help your child develop healthy coping mechanisms - which simply means ways to take good care of themselves when anxiety strikes.  The key is for them to understand that often the best way to help their anxiety is not by thinking up solutions, but by helping their body know that it is safe right now.  When our bodies know they are safe, our minds will follow.  Breathing exercises, mindfulness techniques, and visualization can be powerful tools here. Practice these techniques together to show your child that they are not alone in their journey.  

3. Maintain Routine

A consistent daily routine can provide a sense of security and stability for an anxious child. Ensure regular sleep patterns, meal times, and activities to create a predictable environment that can help reduce anxiety levels.

4. Encourage Physical Activity

Regular physical activity can significantly reduce anxiety. Encourage your child to engage in sports, outdoor play, or any physical activities they enjoy. Exercise releases endorphins, which can improve mood and alleviate anxiety.

5. Seek Professional Help

If your child's anxiety is severe or persistent, consider seeking help from a mental health professional. Therapists or counselors specializing in childhood anxiety can provide tailored strategies and support for both your child and your family.  At Self Space, our therapist Hannah Scheuer has years of experience working with kids experiencing anxiety.

Supporting a child with anxiety requires patience, understanding, and proactive strategies. By fostering open communication, teaching coping skills, maintaining a routine, and seeking professional help when needed, you can help your child navigate their anxiety and build resilience for the future. Remember, your support and presence are vital in helping your child feel safe and understood during anxious times.

Rachel Lund started Self Space out of the deep belief in the power of therapy to change people’s lives from the inside out. Her hope is to help people find more safety, care and love in their lives. Rachel is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Clinical Supervisor in Washington state, and focuses on treating clients through a neuropsychotherapy approach to therapy that connects mind+body.